what to do

So…after meeting I went in service with Taylor Tammy and Annie. Basically I sat in the back seat while Annie slept on my shoulder. Then Sarah and I went over to Tay’s. I gave Milee a massage then Sarah took my car to work cuz she out of gas and I just filled up. Then Tay and I are laying there watching TV and Kevin comes over. Later Milee gets an upseting phone call and throws the remote, braking it. Then we go to store and get Chocolate Kisses cuz Kevin has idea to put them on Dylan’s bed in shape of hearts. Turned out good. Dylan’s room was clean too! But arnory Kevin put some kisses in shape of TH so Dylan would think I put them there. I had already texted him that Kevin had a surprise for him. Anyways. I gave Milee another massage. after we ate Supper…buffalo chicken pizza from casey’s. YUM! Then Dylan wanted a massage… always a pleasure to rub a handsome man down. then we all laid on the couches and watched movies and fell asleep. I think I may have heard kissing, but if so I’m pretending it was the rain. Kevin finally went home. then a few minutes later, or like an hour. Dylan finally kicked me too much and I ended up waking him so that he went to bed. Milee then woke up and went to bed. me and tay stayed on the couches. Finally I woke and realized I had an hour before I needed to be leaving for work. So I walked home. it got cold after the storm. I texted Dylan that it was nice sleeping with him again. He asked if that was apropriate. I said if someone not there read the text then no it wouldn’t seem apropriate. But I don’t easily fall asleep with people. It takes a number of nights beore I finally get comfortable enough with that person. Dylan I am comfortable with. I don’t ever think of him sexually, but if I were permitted I would cuz he is sexy. Oh! all evening and day today I’ve been getting texts from Sarah’s brother. Before when he’d text he’d complain what a loser he is with girls and i’d try suggesting different type girl or look in different places. He proceeds to say I’m the most beautiful woman he has ever seen (he must not get out much) and that he likes me. Later he mentions having his eye on me. This morning he goes hey sexy what you doin? I told him how we have different hope and purpose in life. He said he tried my religion but felt like his stepdad was pushing it down his throat. well I said he can be intense and that is one individual. I’ve been across the country and met great people. Following the beneficial guidance in the Bible and trying to HOnor God is what I want to do. and I want a man I can share that with. (this all seemed to go over his head) He last texted that he wants to take me to dinner and movie. Oh and worst part is the pictures he sent. So he starts with one from when he got his hair straightened. looked like a girl so I said I prefer when it’s curly. THen he sends me another. I said I also liked when he had it dyed dark. He said he color it again for me even though he got made fun of at work. I said it’s your hair do what u want. then he was tying to send an up-to-date photo but said too dark in bedroom so I suggested bathroom. He proceeds to send a photo that does not even show his hair or face but his torso almost to his privates. I said woah. He goes like what you see? anyways he goes on how girls tell him he’s so sweet but then they go back to their ex’s. I told him about Stephen and when he asked how I was I mentioned having slept with Dylan on the couch like maybe he’d think I’m taken. Oh he also is kinda a perv but says he don’t want me to think he is. how does that make it better? Anyway I ‘m in trouble if I keep talking to him, leading him on, breaking his heart. I will hear bout it from his sisters. I’m also in trouble if I start having the same kinda relationship with him I had with Stephen but more dangerous cuz he is closer. I like his hair.  Stephen I liked alot of parts. Dylan I like his lips and everything else. Stephen and Dylan have confident personalities I’m drawn to but David is more the poetic type.  I don’t know what I’m gonna do this evening. Milee wasn’t home yet when I drove by and Sarah is just getting off work. Kinda hungry but I would love to lose ten pounds this week before the assembly or at least before the memorial. Still don’t know what I’m gonna wear. OH well. ttfn.

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