I am an emotional wreck. Again. I don’t know why he doesn’t want to spend time with me anymore. Am i too fat and ugly to stand or is it my personality? He’ll say he’s going to go do this. Ok that should be like twenty minutes but he’ll be gone for hours finding ways to not come home. He won’t make a commitment. Why? If you think you’ll leave in the future then why be with me now? What am i to you? The pain in my back has settled enough that i no longer feel as though i’m in labor but it still leaves me nauseated. It’s the pain in my heart from uncertainty the makes me cry now. I am so tired of being sick having no job being stuck at home all the time being alone getting called stupid and worse. I have always been a joyful easy going person and i’m sorry for getting emotional but i never have before i got pregnant so i’m still not used to it and it’s still not gone. Maybe i just need sleep.